Grief

I don’t understand grief

Everytime I think I have moved past it

It comes back to wash me over in its darkness

Pulling me back into the waves of emptiness

I want to be forgiven

I want to be forgotten

I want to be whole

But grief is not a hill to climb

A race to run or a battle to fight

It’s a monster under your bed you learn to speak to

It’s the lump in your throat that teaches you to be silent

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